Failing by Default
I just came across this interesting quote by beloved author JK Rowling. And it coupled nicely with something @galenkp mentioned about fear of failure, about how people don't live their lives and don't go anywhere for fear they might fail, that it might turn out different from what they thought.
That, in itself, is a stupid thought. Of course it's going to turn out different. Thinking back on all the truly happy moments of my life, not one was like I expected it to be. Neither were the bad moments. But then, if it really would turn out how you imagine it, what would be the point? If it was exactly like what you envisioned in your head, your life would be pretty boring indeed.
Some people expect it to be like that, like it is in their heads and then they're really disappointed when it's not, even when what happens IRL surpasses by far the narrative in their heads. That's just how some people are, they like to be in control.
Others imagine that if you're really good and really quiet, if you sit in your place and never do anything to upset the balance of things, then you'll be spared. But life doesn't give a shit. Do you really imagine there's this great big notebook that ranks how good you are? How quiet and disciplined? It won't.
The other day, I heard a story about some guys who slipped on the ice here and got ran over and their legs were cut off. Horrible fucking story, do you really think someone was noting that they were just trying to get to work so they could make a living for their families? No. They weren't at a wild party in Bali or backpacking across the Alps. They were going to work and nobody cared, they still got hurt.
Because that's life, sometimes you get hurt because you do stupid shit, but often, you get hurt just for breathing. It's not logical. And it's not reasonable. It's just life.
So, what have you failed at lately?
And more importantly, what scares you? What do you have on your to-do list that scares the living hell outta you?
Something that scares me a lot is living cautiously, living in fear that something bad might happen and doing my very best not to let that happen. I don't mean stuff like protecting the people you love or that. Rather not going somewhere for fear you might screw up or get hurt. A question I find myself asking a lot is 'and then what?', I just like it, I suppose. It's a good question. You go, get hurt, and then what?
I like there to be a story, a continuity to things. And chances are life's gonna go on regardless if you get hurt or not, so might as well wreck hell.
That's about all I wanted to tell you today, that you should truly go out there and wreck havoc as much as you can, live your life. Fail.
It sucks, failing. But it's the only way you get better. At anything. We fail constantly, at work, at relationships, and I always ask myself – what, did you expect this to be easy, to be a walk in the park? Where's the fun in that?
Thanks for reading,
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Smart woman. You're right - you never know what some big bad is gonna up and eat ya, so might as well live it up before that happens.
That's sad about the crushed legs. It reminded me of this story from my 3x great grandmother's letters about a doctor her husband served with in the American Civil War. He heroically saved as many lives as he could and then was rushing for the departing train and got his arm crushed underneath it and died of an infection. (I shared it on Steemit last year as part of this project.
I guess all we can do is the best we can, and accept that nobody's really keeping score. Sometimes I wonder if the reason people share so much on social media, and give up so much of their personal information to huge corporations, is because there's comfort in the idea that someone's keeping track of everything that's going on.
Hmm that's an interesting idea, a very interesting one actually, but I wonder...See, I think many people just enjoy a bit of attention. They want to feel like someone cares and that's why they put their lives out there so much...hoping someone might notice them. That's what I think.
That's awful, the story about the doctor :( poor guy. But then, there's really no fairness in the world, is there? It seems awful to imagine your life can change so drastically just like that. In a heartbeat..
If only more people did :) but yeah, that's the plan.
Better to try and fail at it, than doing nothing at all because of the fear of failing.
Apt read, Honeydue.
Thank you :) Yes, very true.
Wow, anything you do is a failure unless it's a success.
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