I clicked because you opened with "This little cutey..."

And I was all like-

That thing there looks like a monster.

And then the terrifying truth unfolded...

IT IS A MONSTER! 😱

Nine inches?! Twice that?!
Plus, because you never name the creature this reads like a horror short. And this notion (that it's fiction) is the only thing that will allow me to sleep at night, for if I knew what to call it, you could damn well bet I'd google it and NEVER go where they go. NEVER. Nope.Nu-uh.