Applied Behaviours. This works very well for most people. It only remains obvious where their soul is clearly meant to escape the system (of dead thinking). Autism dampens all proactivity from the heart for life. The head is just too dominant. Life is the opposite of head.
I think our separated and convenient living from the efforts to hunt and gather (or at least to agricultural activities and the acknowledgment for life cycles and all the connected art) for food produces much more autism than it's commonly perceived. That indeed goes to comment on people and give them compliments as this is a learned strategy to come forward and to be accepted by the people one encounters. I've seen it many times here on the platform and probably I did it many times myself as I assume there may some mild autism/depression living in me (and every "civilized" person) as well. But ask a human for his experiences in having been spiritually and ethically present and he won't even know what you are asking for.
So, asking myself: when was I spiritually present? I can only come up spontaneously with two events. First, the birth of my son. Those precious minutes I was aware that "today's the day" and I felt connected, calm and content. Neither anxious nor enthusiastic but only "there". It was shortly before I lost it all and put myself into the care of the clinic. Biggest mistake ever.
The second event was the week before my mother died and I was in the hospital room with her. Before that, I collected some personal stuff for her, searched for song texts and melodies of which I knew she was accustomed to, her songbook and some other little things. I then was reading and singing for her and that was a spiritual service of importance to both her and me.
Without having the feeling of acting out of spirit it would only be seen as the right behavior but nothing else. In between, I lost many times the confidence of spirituality as grief was gripping me but I was able to shake it off and be light-hearted - also with the help of my dying mother as well.
There was one significant moment when my sister wanted my mom to eat. I was against her pushing food into her mouth, couldn't agree on that and wished my sister to stop. My mother, who almost wasn't able to speak at that time anymore, pushed the spoon away, gave my sister a very direct and clear look and said: "You, eat!" Then ... after some seconds, we all laughed with relief. I felt respect for my mother and I was astounded by her strength in this old, griefing, damaged, pain-giving body. I will never forget her eyes looking at me.
The moment in the chapel (in the freezer) also I was lucky to witness the old neighbor lady from next door (with whom my mom never quite got warmed up) bending down to my dead mother, kissing her gently and friendly on the cheek, saying: "My dear Lindachen" - using the sweet form of her name - "we will greatly miss you". No sign of anxiety from her, nothing of despair but simply the acknowledgment of reality. How good that was.
And what if we don't ask but observe for those spiritual/ethical moments? Could we find them better then? The child examining her ant. The neighbour wishing a departed soul well.
Beautiful examples!
If there is something clinically autistic present for you in your computing system (the brain) then it can be hard to see how even more important than these splendid testimonial examples is the soft weft that runs through your (specific) entire life, like michorrizal roots, seeking connections which are already there as in soulful constellations. If you can already there is nothing autistic about you. If you struggle to do so, never mind, then you are self-curing yourself amazingly. Describing your emotions and observations with as much soul as you do is extremely valid.
Next step: spiritual reality. But it's not for everyone, yet. It's a spiritual evolutionary thing. We mustn't want to run before we can walk. I appreciate your steady footfall.
I was speaking more of an overall observation when it comes to dis-ease (in the literal sense). I do not know enough about the diagnoses of autism - but what caught me was that part where you mention "right behavior" which seems not connected to an inner world but found out as a strategy. To this specific matter, I thought of modern civilization as I assume a lot of people find a strategy without connecting themselves to themselves. ... Hard to explain.
Otherwise, I wouldn't call myself autistic from what I heard and read about it (which is not much).
Same with depression. As I take it literally (pressing emotions deep down) I sense that people tend to do that and, as a consequence, the suppressed emotions start to leak through and the effort to stop them from leaking takes all the energy out - the strength of depression varies but I think many people do have one.
I tend to behave "out of my heart" when I talk too much to people who are always "in their mind". I am happy that I can see and measure that by watching my anxieties rising and falling.
The examples I gave you are really precious to me as they are strong. I am sure there are a lot more but they are not so easy to find and to describe. Some of them happen just fluently and just pass by. Only the after-result or the outcome, so to speak gives those moments a certain satisfaction.
I like it: We mustn't run before we can walk! How often I have had the same insight.
Very grateful for your appreciation of my spiritual examples.