RE: Finding an Educational Paradigm that Works for your Family
Thanks! I didn't start out super well thought out either. In fact, I think I'm still winging it in a lot of ways. And my ideas have definitely changed over the years. I was so uptight in the early years. I have definitely relaxed a lot of that.
Sometimes how often I feel like I fall short as a mom is totally and completely overwhelming. There's nothing in this world I want more strongly to do perfectly and also nothing so absolutely impossible to be perfect at. Like you say, though, they come out quite brilliant, and sometimes that feels like a miracle, but I'm certainly glad I've put in as much effort as I have because I know it makes a difference. And it really is nice when they function so well in the outer world if for no other reason than to allow me to stick my tongue out at everyone.
You're so on point about knowing and respecting our kids. So many people wonder why they can't understand or communicate with their children, but when you spend maybe an hour a day with them, what's to be expected? I wouldn't trade any of these gray hair and ulcer making hours. Well, I could maybe use a couple hours break every now and then. Thanks so much for stopping by and for a kind and thoughtful comment. It means a lot to me, and I can talk forever about it too. And thanks for raising kids in a good way. I believe we're doing world changing work here.
Parenting is just such a continuing-never-quite-know-if-you-got-it-right kind of thing! The lack of any sort of concrete "Yep, I did that right" about drove me mad sometimes, but I'd just swallow the anxiety and keep plodding along. It always helped to hear that other people struggled (and thus the advent of the internet was in some ways a life saving thing for me!) and makes me want to write more about my own parenting decisions, processes, thoughts, etc... but I oftentimes STILL find myself doubting that I did it "right" even though my kids are grown, healthy and happy and THEY tell me I did a great job! Self doubt is something I've always struggled with...
but you are So right, we are doing world changing work!
It helps so much to have community, even online. I can't even express how grateful I am for all y'all other mamas. Self doubt plagues me too, though I also have bouts with wild ego as well. Community is helpful there too.
"Wild Ego" Yep. I still have that and seem to have passed it on to my children a little too well! :) They are all crazy confident. You are awesome. I look forward to seeing more posts.
Aww, thanks! We were just talking about the ego thing today. I was talking to my older daughter about things I am grateful for, including my amazing kids, and she said, "Yes, we are really quite awesome and humble too." The oldest seems to have lost a little since venturing out into the world - ugly breakup, existential dread, poverty, etc., but I think he'll get it back.
The best part of being a strong person with a solid foundation and support system is the ability to get back up. My son went through the first relationship breakup thing last year, but he's definitely finding himself again and I can tell in our discussions that he learned a lot about himself through the experience.
Totally true. My son also learned a lot, and he's finding his way back. It's been over a year, but they were together for maybe 2 or 3 years. I don't ever want to move back to the US, but I do wish I could be closer to him.