Isn't it so frustrating when you have an issue and feel all alone when, in fact, almost everyone has the same issue! I had a hard time talking about it when I was in school because I was terribly shy and socially inadequate.

I wish I could remember what event clicked when I stopped saying "Why me?" and started saying, "Why NOT me...and why not you too?"

And I've found that in most situations, it only takes ONE person to say something with love to open up the floodgates for other souls who didn't have the courage to say it first. That's where you find community and the people you were meant to connect with.

I often turn to self-deprecating humor. It's a two-edged sword I think. It empowers me to say this is who I am and it's okay to laugh at my goofiness. But the sharp edge of it is that is building the wall against doubt or fear or awkwardness. By voicing my imperfections, I take the sting away from anyone who might be thinking or voicing it. It's safe behind my wall...but it also cuts me off from truly being.

"I am such an idiot!"
"Why yes, Meredith, that was an idiot thing to do."
"I know, right?!?!"
[Cue laughter.]

As for my Korean relatives... They're all so petite and pretty and I will always remain the fat American relative, but instead of feeling inadequate around them, I kind of give them a big old bear hug - and if they tease me too bad, I sit on them. It's really kind of hysterical actually. :)