THE SEPTEMBER CONTEST #1 sduttaskitchen | Can a best friend become a good life partner?

A picture of I and my best friend together after an outing

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Introduction

One of the sweetest feelings in life is the feeling of having someone who gets you, knows your weakness and strength and someone who entirely makes you comfortable and more of yourself.

On many occasions we've heard people say “Marry your best friend”, this kind of friendship sometimes escalates to something more intimate. While it works for some people, it doesn't work too well for some.

Personally,I believe in building a really intimate relationship with ones Best friend because this is the very foundation on which a solid marriage is built.
In this discussion, I'll like to share my thoughts with y'all.

A picture if I and my best friend having a good time

DO YOU THINK A BEST FRIEND CAN BECOME A GOOD LIFE PARTNER?

Absolutely, yes.
I believe it's possible for friends to become life partners. A best friend already knows your flaws,weakness, insecurities, strength, your fears,they've seen your most unguarded moments and you already know their truths. There's a level of understanding that many couples spend years trying to build.

These familiarities reduces the need to pretend,which can make the relationship more authentic and the love stronger. While a best friend can become a life partner, the friendship must adapt,change and mature ..if not ,it's risk collapsing under new expectations.

Shifts from friendships to partners requires more than just the familiarity.It requires real physical and romantic pull,not just convenience.

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DO YOU BELIEVE FRIENDSHIP AND BECOMING LIFE PARTNER ARE DISTINCT?HOW!

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love and friendship though related, aren't identical.Love in relationships requires intimacy, responsibility and shared direction.Without those, friendship alone may not survive the weight of marriage.

• IN FRIENDSHIP:

There's freedom to laugh without judgement,to walk away when you feel you need space and lots more.

Let's take for example, if you forget your best friend's birthday,they might sulk but eventually you'll make it up with maybe parfait or nice treat.Friendship thrives on freedom and convenience,taking each other as you come. In friendship there are no responsibilities attached, no expectations and judgements.Infact, a person can be your best friend without sharing your goals and aspirations and it will be totally fine.

• LIFE PARTNER :

Now this is friendship on steroids.Here you aren't just sharing memes, there are responsibilities to share, you share rents, you have to share goals and directions, you have to share your bed too!

In partnership unlike friendship ,you don't just walk away when you feel like just because you need space, there's accountability.Its showing up consistently even on days when you aren't even in the mood.

Now back to my birthday story, if you forget your partner's birthday, let's say...you may need a week or more of apologies, surprise packages and maybe doing their own chores for them.if need be.

Yes, both share the same root; love, trust, loyalty but they aren't the same.But that's why people think friendship is the best foundation for marriage.I do too!

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SHARE SOME PROS AND CONS IF ONE ACCEPTS A FRIEND AS A LIFE PARTNER.

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PROS

▫️~TRUST:Trust is already proven, you don't have to build it from scratch anymore

▫️ ~SHARED VALUES: You both already share some inside habits ,jokes and some memories, adventures that can wax your relationship stronger.

▫️ ~TRANSPARENCY: There's transparency because you already know their secrets,so there won't be shocking surprises later.

▫️~There's emotional comfort,you don't need to pretend,already you're able to talk to this person freely about your problems.

▫️~Easy communication is achieves.Friends talk freely with less fear if judgement.It helps marital communication go smoothly.

▫️~Here ,you can easily resolve conflicts and fights cause your friendship muscle had been trained.And the conflicts or argument will be less toxic,infact funny at times. You won't really be pissed that they ate the last soup cause you've experienced it dozens of times and you'll get some Instances like “Why did you start the movie before me?” Without feeling angry or humiliated because you're used to him/her.

▫️~Here there's security,you are loved for who you are not what you pretended to be .

CONS

▪️~You risk loosing two things at the same time if the relationship doesn't work out.

▪️ ~There's no more mystery which breed less attractions sometimes.You already know this person too well and it's be honest , mysteries are Intriguing parts of relationships.Nothing really surprises you anymore.

▪️ ~There is over familiarity and sometimes disrespect.Since you're overfamiliar,you might stop putting much effort in romance or the relationship.

▪️~Also one person may fall in love deeper than the which will really hurt the friendship and the feelings if the other party.

▪️ ~DIFFERENT LIFE GOALS :Being best friends doesn't guarantee alignment in long term visions like career goals, parenting styles or financial methods.

Friendship and partnerships can merge beautifully but not automatically.Friendshio is like the soil, partnership is like the seed-fragile and full of potential.

I'd like to invite @davidmark,@imohmitch and @precious9 to share with us their take on marrying a best friend