"Marriage 50/50; Fair or Impossible?"

You see these photo of a husband and wife smiling? It's , beautiful and sweet, right!? But let's say the true—behind that smile, there's a lot work that happen. Marriage is not only love and sweet words. It involves bills, house chores,children problem, and real-life wahala which two people have to carry together.

So think of it!how should couples share some things like money, the chores, and responsibilities? Let see...

Hmm. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. If both of them work and earn almost the same amount of money, then sharing things half-half can work well. But if one person earn more or work more than the other, doing 50/50 can cause problem

Let’s say if the man earn ₦400,000 and the woman earn ₦100,000. If you tell both of them to pay the rent equally, the woman will surely struggle. The better way is to make them talk and agree. Maybe the man will handle the big bills like rent and school fees, while the woman will take care of foodstuff, NEPA bill, and other small-small things.

Same thing with house work. If both of them come back tired, they can share the work. But if one person is less busy or always at the house, he or she might be the one to do more. Marriage is not by who do more, it’s about helping each other.

No, not every time. Equal means doing the same thing. Fair means doing something that make sense for both people. They can work together at the farm and that doesn't mean they will have the same strength and power while working.

Also, lets assume, the woman is a nurse that do night shift, and the man has a shop where he runs during the day. If they try to do 50/50 for house work, the woman can be break down. The fair way is to make the man do more for house during the week, and they will share things on weekend.

Marriage is not a fight. It's not by who win. It's by understanding. If one person carry load for one side, the other person will support for another side. That one is the fairness.

Yes, that one make sense. If one person work hard outside, the other can help more for house.

Let's say the man is a banker that leaves house by 6am and come back by 9pm. And the woman is a teacher that close by 2pm. It will make sense if she cook, help the children with homework, and tidy the house. Then weekend, the man will join to do things.

It's not all about being man or woman. It's about balance. If one person is tired, then the other has to step in. That one is love.

Here are some simple ways that will work:

• Talking: You don't have to wait until a person is angry before you sit down to talk. Just try to create conversations and ask, “Are you okay with how things are going?”

• Making small plan: You can write who will have to do this and that. It will help avoid confusion.

• Be flexible: Life can change. If one person get new job or fall sick, you have to adjust the plan.

• Say thank you: Small “thank you” can make someone to feel good.

• Don't compare: Every marriage get their own style and pattern. Something that work for your friend might not work for you.

• Laugh small: It's not every day everything will go perfect. So laughing when things scatter or get out of hand can help. And always try to forgive quickly.

Marriage is not about who do pass. Its about helping each other, showing love, and being fair. Some days one person will give more or less. Well, it's still okay and accepted,as far as the both people always feel respected and appreciated.

In all, let's know that behind every smiling couple, it's really a deep sacrifice, understanding, and teamwork that is on going between them. Whether the both chose to do 50/50 or 70/30, what matters most is that both partners should try all their best in every aspect.

_{All shown pictures are mine shoot on Tecno spark30. 📸📱}

Cc:
@ninapenda