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I read somewhere that they should be very hard grown, if they are fertilised, they flower themselves to death

Mine look pretty hard grown but I like that, it gives them character

I love the little mini-tree look, especially when they also drop roots down from the stems. The smaller varieties are like natural bonsai

Yes! Especially the first one, A. sedifolium

Succulents never do well with fertiliser, I like to leave them in sandy mixes and let them grow slowly