Incredible India monthly contest of October #1| Ego vs Self-confidence!

Last two weeks I had a wedding to attend, it wasn't just anyhow wedding, but one where I was supposed to “shine bright” with my outfit,since it was my cousin's wedding. I gave my tailor strict instructions: “Make it sharp and fit." He nodded like agama lizard.

The day came ,I went to the tailor to collect my outfit. I wore it with pride, and strutted into the event like a New nollywood star. But as I walked in, I noticed something strange. People were whispering. Some were giggling. I heard, one aunty even asked, “Is this the new fashion or a mistake in sewing?”

I looked down.

The trousers one leg was longer than the other leg. The top had one sleeve longer than the other. It looked like a confused map of Nigeria i drew back then in school.

I refused to admit it was bad. I kept walking around like I was modeling for a fashion. My ego said, “Don’t let them laugh at you.” But deep down, I knew — I looked like a walking comedy skit. Then,self confidence said "Join them to smile and laugh out, and you can even turn it to a joke and later go change the dress."

That moment? Ego, do have power than self confidence. Confidence would’ve just laughed, owned it, and maybe even turned it into a joke. But I thank God I later go change the dress.

	With Ego

With self-confidence

From my own aspect, ego is that stubborn voice that says, “You must always claim to be right even though you know you are wrong. Also You must always look perfect no matter what condition you are in.” However, it’s the part of you that refuses to admit when something’s wrong— even when your trousers are clearly torn and you know about it and the trouser will be begging for help to change it, but you ignored because of ego.

Self-confidence, however, is really the calm assurance in us that says, “I’m not really perfect, but I’m proud of who I am.” It’s also the ability to laugh at ourself, learn from mistakes, and keep moving forward and not with pride or ego.

Ego wants an applause. While Confidence wants growth.

However, I’ve seen that ego makes people to argue over small things, just to protect their pride. I’ve also seen confidence making people to admit their flaws and still shine.

No doubt,i always try to ask myself: How do you respond when things don’t go your way?

• Ego always blames others.
• Confidence always takes responsibility.

Ego says, “It’s not my fault.”
Confidence says, “What can I learn from this thing at the moment?”

Here is another example. My friend Victor once tried to cook for me when I visited him. He messed up cooking the rice— it came out like porridge ,there was a lot of water. We both laughed and I offered to help him. If Victor had Ego he would’ve said, “That’s how I like it.” But Victor said, “Wow, truly I really messed up. Teach me how you use to Cook yours nah” That is self confidence.

Ego is afraid of looking weak. While Confidence is strong enough to be honest and bold.

Also, ego compares with others and says. “I must be better than others everytime.”

Confidence improves and says. “I must always be better than I was yesterday.”

Honestly, with my view. Ego must surely be rejected — or at least kept in check from time to time. Confidence must be embraced always, like a cold breeze in a very hot weather.

Why? Because ego blocks growth. It makes someone to think that he have arrived. It makes you ignore other people's advice. It also makes someone to defend bad tailoring in public.

Confidence, on the other hand, helps anyone to learn, adapt, and evolve. It allows anybody to take other peoples feedback, laugh at mistakes, and keep improving forward.

However i can really remember when I first started writing here on Steemit. My first article was full of grammatical errors. Someone corrected me here publicly. Ego wanted to clap me back to defend myself. But with Confidence I said, “Thank you. I’ll do better.” However, today, I write with pride — and fewer typos because I let self-confidence controls me.

Confidence is good in building. While Ego is good in breaking.

Also Confidence is very quiet and full of strength. While Ego is really loud with pride and full of insecurity.

So, in all, next time we find ourself in any situation — whether it’s a tailor disaster like mine ,or a failed plan, or a tough conversation — ask yourself: “Am I reacting from ego or responding with confidence?”

I believe we all will love to choose confidence. If that's the case let all of us try to laugh at our mistakes, and learn from our failures, and also grow with grace and not with ego and pride.

But don't forget that if you ever see me wearing a shirt with one sleeve longer than the other again and the trouser also longer than the other, just know — I’m not confused,and it's the tailor fault. I’m confidential.😄

_{All shown pictures are mine shoot on Tecno spark30.}

Cc:
@meraindia