I struggle with that too. Learning to just listen is challenging. You make an excellent point that when asked it’s only fair for it to be given regardless of feelings. only a few people are brave enough to request change in a polite way. In this case, my friend called me out on a matter I was blinded too. I couldn’t be more grateful. I’m sure I do it often and have annoyed or worse offended others. Without this person I wouldn’t even be aware.