Thanks, Luke. You are not alone man. My wife and I had quite a few intense arguments (an understatement, perhaps) and shouting matches throughout my son's infancy and toddlerhood, and sometimes I see the tantrums as a result of that pent up fear and frustration. Sometimes it seems like it might be totally unrelated. I don't mean to say that you and your partner also fit this description, just that in my case it is pertinent. I have found that when I am really at the end of my patience, the key is not so much accepting my son, but accepting myself and the fact that I am extremely stressed and disturbed for some reason. An individual truly at peace could be standing in the midst of 20,000 screaming "Tantrum-ites" and still be able to handle things with compassion. When I can fully accept myself, even if for a brief and fleeting moment, I have found those moments are when I can calm my son down (even if what he is doing seems senseless or is violent) because he finally feels my love coming through, and he feels my love for myself. None of us are perfect, man. Jeeze, I am struggling nearly every singe day wondering if I am a good enough father. But. You know what? If you have made the choice, and keep making that choice even--and especially even--after failures and setbacks, to be a peaceful parent, I feel that that is all that matters. Glad to know people like yourself and your wife are out there, giving it an honest go alongside me.