Humphrey Yogart

Humphrey Yogart made his way through the background of Humphrey Bogart films on the hunt for fresh berries to add to his face / crab claw grasping at tables as Sam turned the mood as thick as piano waltz butter / soaking the extras as Lauren Bacall told everyone what to do with a whistle / swapping recipes with the falcon for fruit parfaits / feeding Audrey Hepburn a foot as Bogey was off playing his echo of Mr. Darcy, knowing that they could regrow the foot, anyway / not going anywhere near The African Queen / and What is The Who Who Where Why of This Alternate History? / What Is The Real The Reason Why This Gollum Haunted Bogart’s Age So? / Why A Yogurt Ghost In Addition To Whatever Ghosts Were Already There? / Perhaps because when Moore’s Law took 1984 and threw it in a gumbo with the criticism of CCTV culture when CCTV culture first arose in the United Kingdom (in a pot large enough for everyone to have a go saying, “Pot, kettle, black”) with the omnipresent Periscope and Facebook Live and billion-plus phones, a reverse-escape hatch opened up and the healthiest health food in human form anyone has ever seen decided to take a step back in time to learn how to go as black as the night.