Nine months, One day (The pain of a one-day loss)

Greeting Steemit Family

It hurts, and it really hurts. I'm not a mother, but I deeply feel how painful it must be to lose a baby. It was Sunday, August 3rd. I had planned to go for my usual morning sports. My friend had passed the news to me the previous day that his wife was in the labour room.

From what I have observed, women go through so much during pregnancy and childbirth. The whole nine-month journey is not an easy one. You often hear of mood swings and discomfort, and rightly so. The body changes, leading to restlessness and inconvenience. Even the physical change of carrying a long belly alone is enough to make anyone moody.

You can break down these nine months into stages as the baby develops in the womb. During the early stages, some women are still active and excited in their daily routines. The changes might only be noticeable through mild temperature or morning sickness. Some women do not even go for checkups, relying instead on herbs. For many, this period is not so scary unless there are specific health challenges.

But the final three months before delivery. Personally, I fear this period the most for women. It’s one of the most fragile times during pregnancy. The woman has to be extremely careful, both for herself and the unborn child. She can feel the baby actively moving inside her, growing and preparing for the world.

This is the time to encourage and celebrate women for their courage. I often joke that men carry a baby (sperm) all their life, but women carry for nine months. Honestly, none of it is easy. Pregnancy takes women away from their usual activities for their safety and that of the baby. I celebrate every woman. You are truly strong, and I personally hold you in high esteem.

Why am I sharing this today?

As I mentioned earlier, my friend’s wife was taken to the hospital on Saturday. She was due for delivery. After some hours of labour, an emergency C-section had to be performed. It was successful, and she delivered a baby boy. However, the baby had complications breathing and was taken to the nursery ward.

I don’t know much about that ward, but from what I have heard, it's a place for babies needing close attention, especially for breathing issues. The baby was admitted for monitoring and stabilisation.

I had no idea of all this. I planned to quickly check on them at the hospital and then go for my morning sport. But when I got there, I was told the baby had been admitted to the nursery. That hit me differently because of the stories I have heard about babies in that ward.

My friend was alone at the time with the baby. I had to stay and help, running around to buy medications and anything else needed. I couldn’t walk away. I saw the surgical pain on his wife's face, and I could not just leave. I skipped my sports and stayed until about midday.
Then my friend came out of the nursery ward and opened his arms to me. I did not understand what he meant. I asked what was wrong. I thought we were going to buy more medication. He shook his head and said quietly, “He’s gone... How will I tell my wife?”

Grieving the loss of a one-day-old child hits differently.

How do you walk into a hospital pregnant and leave without the baby you carried for nine months? I was speechless. I could not say anything. Women love and bond with their children deeply, even before they are born. Losing that child is beyond heartbreaking.

We know the pain of losing an elderly family member, imagine what it feels like to lose a newborn. A child who has been nurtured for nine whole months. Losing them on the very first day, the very day that was supposed to be filled with joy, is painful beyond words. I had rushed to join in the celebration, but there was no joy to be found on their faces.

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Cheers
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@fombae