In a fast-paced world, people tend to explode over the slightest thing. If a client takes a long time to respond, or if they receive a "no" as an answer or an inappropriate comment during a negotiation, the person reacts immediately, unleashing their emotions in an uncontrolled manner. And this has consequences.
Today I experienced an episode that led me to reflect on this: a child at school was presenting a topic, a paragraph of no more than four lines, until at one point, due to nerves, he stumbled and couldn't continue. At that very moment, he exploded, hitting the microphone and shouting. He displayed an angry reaction that surprised the entire audience. Then, he went to a corner and didn't want to speak anymore. An unusual reaction. At that moment, I thought, "He's just a kid." And this doesn't only happen to young people; adults go through the same experiences, and in many cases, they don't end well.
Let's keep in mind that having emotions isn't abnormal, it's totally different; it's normal. But what makes the difference here is what we do with these emotions.
This is where emotional intelligence comes in. This isn't about being cold-hearted in the face of emotions, much less swallowing everything that happens and pretending nothing moves us. Emotional intelligence is about recognizing what we're feeling in that moment, understanding it, and choosing how we're going to respond to those emotions. In short, it's about taking a break between what happens and how we react. This somehow shows our personal and professional growth.
There's a proverb in the Bible that describes it very well: "He who controls his spirit is stronger than he who conquers a whole city." What can we do in a similar situation? Before exploding, do a very simple exercise. If it works, close your mouth, don't speak, and count 10 seconds. In those moments, think, "Does this really add to me or subtract from me?" This simply creates a pause between what we feel and the reaction. We stop the reaction and reflect. In other words, we interpose reason by not letting ourselves be dominated by emotion. When something bothers us too much, let's ask ourselves the following question: Is it worth losing our peace over this? The key here is to think before reacting.
