New school versus old school parenting.

As generations change baton from the Baby boomers, to Generation X, to the Millennials, to now Generation Z (aka Gen Z), we've experienced different astronomical changes across all human existence from technology to society and parenting included. Now, the question of this discussion is what do we think about parenting across this generations. Do we taking into the feeling of our children or that they have certain morals with our without our presence? Well, here is what I think of it all as I'm guided by the guidelines.

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There's this saying that goes like this Spare the rod and spoil the child , Do you think it is still valid in this new school parenting?

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I think the saying, "Spare the rod and spoil the child," basically means that if we don't discipline kids, they'll grow up spoiled and it is not about necessarily using the rod.

In today's world, I agree that in the new style of parenting, things are different as it used to be when I was growing as a kid myself. Today, it is all about talking, understanding, and guiding kids. Instead of punishments, the focus is on teaching them how to handle their feelings, make good choices, and be responsible.

Hence, does the saying still hold up? Well, I think so. Yes, the new way of parenting believes in setting clear rules and expectations and does so with love and understanding. It's about helping kids learn from their mistakes, not punishing them. Yes, it's all about building a strong relationship where kids feel safe to talk and learn, but then what happens when they refuse to learn? do you let them be or discipline (the rod) them? Not all discipline has to be punishment by the actual rod (cane, as we know), it can be by certain restrictions till they learn their mistake.

The goal is still for us to raise good kids, and even though the methods may have changed, the kids still need discipline. But then, instead of relying on fear and severe punishment, we can communicate, empathy, and teaching to help discipline our kids to grow into well-rounded adults.

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Do you think Old school parents were too strict compared to new school parenting?

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From what I've gathered, most of us see the old school way of parenting as a strict teacher, who had a lot of rules, and if you broke them, there were consequences, sometimes pretty harsh ones. But then, the common idea is that, it was to make sure kids behaved, respected adults, and learned right from wrong.

image source; Pixabay

While they see the new school way as more like a friendly teacher, still with rules, but are more focused on understanding why kids do what they do, so they try to talk things out, help kids manage their feelings, and teach them how to make good choices.

I believe this is the picture on everyone's mind. So, were old-school parents too strict? Well, for me it depends as some might say yes, pointing out that the old ways could be too focused on control and not enough on understanding. They might say that the punishments were sometimes too harsh and could hurt kids emotionally.

Then, others like me might say no, arguing that the old ways taught us important values like respect and discipline, which helped us grow up to be responsible adults without severe punishments or literally using the rod on us.

So to me, both styles have their pros and cons and the key is finding what works for your family, where kids feel loved, supported, and encouraged to grow into happy and self sufficient adults.

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which one were you raised ? Do you think you were raised right.

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I came into this world in the mid 90's, the millennials, so I guess I was raised in an old school parenting style, or maybe both since me mum, whom I grow up with never used a rod (cane) on me although certain aunties and uncles did.

So yes, it wasn't the "spare the rod" type of parenting, as my parents never believed in hitting, they had a different approach, one that focused on instilling core morals, the values that guide how we live.

The rules were clear, I knew what was expected of me. There was no room for laziness, dishonesty, or disrespect. If I messed up, there were consequences, but those consequences weren't about pain. They were about learning. Maybe I'd lose TV time, or have to do extra chores, or miss out on a fun activity. The punishment always fitted the crime committed.

The focus was always on me to understanding why something was wrong. My mum would sit down with me and talk, explaining how my actions affected others, and why certain behaviours weren't okay. It wasn't about yelling or making me feel ashamed but about teaching me to think for myself and make better choices next time.

She taught me the importance of honesty, kindness, and hard work and showed me by example. She was honest in her dealings, kind to others, and worked hard to provide for us and always willing to listen and offer guidance.

Looking back, I realize she was teaching me to be a good person and to have strong morals, to be able to stand up for what's right, and to treat others with respect. It wasn't about fear or control. It was about love, guidance, and helping me grow into a responsible adult.

I'm grateful for the way I was raised. It wasn't always easy, but it shaped me into who I am today. I believe I was raised right, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

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Do you think we should go back to old school parenting or stick to new school parenting.

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Old-school parenting wasn't always about the strict rules, and sometimes, physical punishment but about discipline. The idea was to teach us obedience and respect. New-school parenting however tends to be more focused on understanding a child's feelings, open communication, and setting boundaries rather than punishments.

Editted using Pixellab app. image source; Pixabay

Now, should we go back to the old ways or stick with the new? It's not a simple "yes" or "no" for me as during old school, some good things like clear expectations and teaching respect, was first hand. But we seem to think just about the strictness and potential for physical punishment.

Now in the new school, it's all for encouraging kids to express themselves, build confidence, and develop strong relationships with their parents. But sometimes, it can lack clear boundaries, and the discipline the kids need.

Therefore, I think the best way out is to mix both, i.e., we can take the good parts of the old school (teaching respect and having clear rules) and combine them with the good parts of the new school (open communication and understanding a child's feelings).

This way, we can set expectations, but also listening to our children. It's about discipline, but not with physical punishments. It's about teaching values and building a strong relationship. Hence, we shouldn't go fully back to old-school parenting or stick completely to new-school parenting. Because I believe the best approach is a blend of both, taking the best parts of each to create a balanced and effective parenting style.

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I want to take this opportunity to invite @josepha, @ikwal and @kidi40.

Thank You for your Time

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NOTE: Always have a smile on your face, as you are never fully dressed without one.