The Funniest Stoner Fails: Hilarious Stories from the High Life
Getting high can be the perfect catalyst for goofs and gaffs that leave you with a stitch in your side. Here are 4 of the funniest stories from the ups and downs of living the high life!
Line, Please!
My friend makes the best pot brownies. So one time we were hanging out at his place, watching a stoner movie, when I realized that I couldn’t understand any of the dialogue.
At first, we just found it funny, but then the panic set in. We both started to get worried that this would be a permanent condition and we’d never be able to watch movies again. Finally, we just decided that the best idea would be to crawl (we were too high to walk straight) closer to the TV.
Something about how ridiculous the whole thing felt shocked me to a jarring realization. One of us must have accidentally switched the audio language when turning off captions at the start. We still laugh about this to this day.
—Story by Josh
Let’s Put It to a Vote
My brother and I love playing video games when we’re high. Usually, it’s easy to decide on one, but we both really wanted to play two different games this one time. After 30 minutes of trying to convince each other, we decided that the best way to settle this debate would be by creating a fake government with laws and a legislature.
It seemed like putting it to a democratic vote was the only option here, and that’s what we did. But by the time we finished, neither of us was interested in actually playing anymore. We never had a disagreement on which game to play ever again.
—Story by Kevin
Meeting My Doppelganger
My friend and I used to know a guy who got popular for giving out free gummies at parties. And these weren’t just any gummies. They were supposed to be the best delta-8 gummies on campus. So when I got an invite for Halloween, I obviously just had to try them.
The gummies were yum, and the high was beyond exhilarating. But then, around 2 hours in, I saw someone dressed exactly like me. I thought it was a coincidence at first. But the more I stared, the weirder it felt.
Not only were we wearing the exact same outfit, but she even had the same hair color and cut as me! By this point, I was ready for answers, and I went closer to demand an explanation. Who was this mysterious doppelganger?
But after about 15 minutes of arguing with her, my friends came up to check on us. They immediately started laughing and I realized this must’ve been some sick prank they’d pulled. Turns out I was wrong because eventually, they managed to pull me away from my reflection and calm me down. To this day, they’ve never let me live this down.
—Story by Allie
The Giant Bubble
This one time at a concert, I reached the venue just as the headliner was about to go on. My mind was soaring with twist vape juice, and I was feeding off the anticipation as people milled around the base of the stage. I popped some chewing gum to keep my jaw from grinding, and managed to find a good spot away from the speakers, where I found myself next to this girl fumbling around in her bag.
Despite a good 5 minutes of searching, she clearly couldn’t find whatever it was she was looking for. I was vaguely aware of her mumbling something about “doing it manually,” and then out of nowhere, she started to blow the biggest bubble I’d ever seen anyone blow.
I watched the bubble grow even bigger while my own gum grew dangerously close to falling out of my now drooping mouth. This was unreal. Fully freaked out at this point, I finally blurted, “What kind of gum is that!?”
The girl looked super confused for a second before deadpanning, “It’s a beach ball, dude.” I was too embarrassed to stay in that spot anymore and spent the rest of the concert all the way at the back.
—Story by James
That Make the Cut
Half the fun of getting high with your friends is making memories and goofing around over the silliest things. But it’s also important to go slow and to be sure that you’re around people you feel safe with. If you’re getting high for the first time, it always helps to have someone you can count on who’ll be able to watch over you if you do end up feeling unsafe or unwell.